Self image | Self love.

At first, I thought that it was a boy that boosted my confidence, that made me start caring about my body and how I looked.And then I saw this quote;

Confidence happens when you let it happen. No one gives it to you, which is great, because it also means they can’t take it from you. -Brooke Magnanti

And it made me realize it's been me all along. Because that boy is practically gone now, and I'm still working on my inner and outer beauty. I'm not doing it for him, or for anyone else. I'm doing it for myself.

It's so weird, ya know. I've never cared, I've never loved myself, or my body this much. I've always worried about my looks, but that wasn't a caring kind of worry. It was a "They're not going to like the way I look" kind of worry. And so I always tried to tell myself "It's your personality that counts" and so I never paid any attention and never worked on my appearance.

It took 12 years of self harm for me to wake up.

And, I gotta tell you, it feel amazing to be awake! I've just been dragging my feet through life, always wishing I was someone or somewhere else. But now I feel good to be where I am, and great to be myself.

I am beautiful, even though not everybody sees it (including myself).
I am strong.
I am awesome.
I am funny.
I am a caring, compassionate person.
I am considerate.
I am weird, but it's okay, because that's what makes me cool.
I am talented.
I am great at my job.
I am blessed.
I am good enough.
I am worth it.

I will, finally, be okay.
And I am excited for that!